I didn’t really want to post a blog last week given how it ended. I’m not really sure I should post today either. But I was thinking this morning about this post I had written a couple of years ago about “othering” and how much damage it can do when writers, leaders, or anyone with power does it, whether consciously or unconsciously. At the time, I was speaking about the people that my employer and other social service nonprofits serve. People who came to us for help, treatment, or support. I wasn’t really talking about our society in general.
But I’m increasingly feeling like “othering” is taking over our lives in so many ways. It seems like we are focusing on what makes us different and not what brings us together. There are leaders and people of influence who are gleefully creating division, confusion, even hatred all in an effort to keep us separate. We are “othering” each other at a time when we should be looking for consensus. I don’t understand it. Yet, I find myself guilty of it at times. It sometimes seems easier in a sick and twisted way. Making the “other” the villain is easier to accept then trying to figure out where we can connect.
Just as it takes vigilance to avoid placing clients of shelters or food pantries in an “other” box that doesn’t accurately describe them, I am going to try to use the same vigilance in not placing people I don’t politically, religiously, or ideologically relate to or agree with in a similar “other” box. I will always try to find common ground or at least acceptance of their point of view. The consequences of not doing that, both to my own mental health and to our society at large, are immense.
P.S. I feel like I need to add this note that even as I try to find common ground with those who I don’t agree with, I AM NOT going to change my own very strongly held beliefs on a woman’s right to choose or that common sense gun control laws are necessary or that our government should not have the power to tell teachers what to teach and kids what to read. Those beliefs are not up for debate. I will only try to hear different points of view and understand where they come from.
